Friday, June 21, 2013

Another Contest, Girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                     Last evening, Monsieur and I just acquired a new land line phone. After its installation, and test calls to make sure it is working, the next most important decision is--what message to leave on the answering machine?????????

                                                       You see, ours have become famous.  It started several years back, when Monsieur was on Bethune Street.  We used Nancy Kelly's speech from "The Bad Seed--"You hit him with the shoes, didn't you?..........," which went over well.  Then we switched to "What Ever Happened To Baby Jane," specifically the exchange starting with, "Blanche? Can ya speak to this man from Johnson's?"  That lasted awhile.  As well as Minnie Castevet's opening remarks from "Rosemary's Baby--"Sometimes I wonder how come you're the leader of anything.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                                         But, by far, our most popular has been me delivering Gladys Cooper's penultimate speech, marking the climax of "The Song Of Bernadette."  You know, the one that begins, "What do you know of suffering?"  This lasted for more than a year, provoked the most response from callers, and I am certain kept phone solicitors at bay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                            Most recently, amidst complaints the 'Bernadette' message was too long--which it was--we opted for a shorter messsage--where I reprise Tallulah Bankhead's famous speech from "Die! Die! My Darling!"--"Is that lipstick, Patricia? Go, and remove that filth AT ONCE!!!!!!!!!!"

                                                               Now I am informed a new message is needed for our new phone. I have some contenders, but really cannot decide.  So, I am going to submit the contenders here, and I want those of you out there who feel free to comment, choosing what you like best.  The winner, whatever it may be, shall be announced on here.

                                                   The Contenders---

                                                     1. Neely's Speech From "Valley Of The Dolls"--"Well, he's not going to get his lousy ten per cent. Because I won't settle for crumbs!  I'll leave this stinkin' show!  WITH dignity!"

                                                       2. Mr. Pinky's Speech From "Hairspray"--"Fatty fatty two by four!  Can't get through the dressing room door?"

                                                         3. The Exchange Between Miriam and Charlotte in "Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte"--"Miriam:  Yes, I told! Why shouldn't I have told that his darling daughter was having a dirty little affair with a married man!!!!!!!  Charlotte:  You're a vile, sorry little bitch!!!!!!!!"

                                                           4. Veda's Dress Speech In "Mildred Pierce"--"It's the dress. It's awfully cheap material.  I can tell by the smell. Well, it seems to me if you're going to buy anything, it should be the best!  This is definitely not the best!  Oh, this is impossible!  Look at this! Ruffles! How could she buy me such a thing? I wouldn't be seen dead in this rag!!!!!!!!!!"

                                                              5. Mrs. Danvers' Underwear Speech In "Rebecca"--"This is where I keep her underwear. It was made especially for her, by the nuns, at the Convent of St. Claire."

                                                                There you have it, darlings!!!!!!!!!!  I simply cannot decide!   So, let me know what you think! And, if you have any you think might be better, feel free to say so, too!

                                                                  As with all contests, the winner will be posted here, and gets a free dinner with The Raving Queen at the restaurant of their choice!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                                   May the best girl win.....GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 comment:

HarlowFan said...

Definitely Mr. Pinky, but only if you include the line "Got a glandular problem but still want the glamour?"